Over the years, I have been interviewed by countless magazines, newspapers, and other media outlets, but the one article that has garnered the most response and feedback by far is an interview I did with Vice in late 2016 on the subject of individuals that have lost their virginity later in life. I have heard from people as far away as Germany and India for whom that article especially resonated. Indeed, the spotlight on communities of individuals who have experienced a crippling lack of sex has recently made headlines with the unfortunate car attack in Toronto by a self-described incel (involuntary celibate).
Going back to the Vice article (which you should definitely check out, it’s excellent), its main thesis is that individuals who missed out on the normal sexual experiences of early adulthood often feel like a tremendous part of their identity or self-esteem is missing, which then propels them to seek to soothe that hole by making up for a prior lack of sexual experiences. In this blog post, I will focus on those individuals who have regrets about missed sexual opportunities, but the same advice will hold true for anyone with any other kind of regrets.
I have often seen individuals who sought out sex workers as a means to catch up on their “numbers” and then opted for a self-diagnosed label of sex addiction when caught by a partner or spouse. Of course, this behavior is not a sign of addiction but rather an attempt to find validation, virility, and self-acceptance through sexual conquests. For this reason, a focus on sex as the main […]